Where Dreams Die
She saw him sitting at his desk. He seemed to be working on something... Probably a new sketch. She loved the way his eyes were focused on the task at hand and the way his fingers moved nimbly across the paper. He sometimes bit his lower lip slightly as he concentrated on the shading or on drawing a certain curve. She was intrigued by this quiet and lovely creature. He did not see her as he kept working on his sketch under the dim light of his table lamp. Every now and then, he laid down his pen on the desk so he could rest and rub his eyes.
At that moment, she wanted to hug him tightly from the back and plant a soft kiss on his cheek... Maybe ruffle his dark, messy hair a little bit. But she did not... Lest she disturbed him. What she loved most about him was the intensity in his beautiful brown eyes, which seemed to project a tiny hint of pain and sadness. Those emotions were indeed very well hidden underneath. She knew he'd been working hard despite everything that has happened and she smiled as she thought about how tough and smart he was. She always knew that he would get far in life if he really focused and gave his mind to it.
Her smile turned into a frown when she noticed the bags under his eyes... He'd not been having proper rest again and had probably been drinking a lot. She sighed at this realization. If only he took better care of himself. He had such a bright and brilliant mind, yet he often indulged in certain vices that could prove fatal to him and his career in the long run. Now, she wanted to hug him even more because she knew that he'd been through hell. She did not know the details of every little problem he's had but she could see it in his eyes that he had suffered enough for a lifetime.
If only she could be there for him... If only he'd let her in. He was a star in her eyes... A star that would shine bright in her heart for eternity. When she thought about how much she longed to build a life with him and how she'd try to make his life complete, she was suddenly filled with an overwhelming sense of despair. Because she knew - that was a dream that might never come true. This realization brought a tear to her eyes and she let out a stifled moan. He suddenly stopped what he was doing and turned around to look. With an uneasy smile spreading across his face, he quickly turned back and continued with his work.
She smiled sadly and thought, "If only he could really see me... If only I could be with him." She left the room so that she could cry without him hearing. Thoughts of "the" day filled her mind as she sobbed and sobbed. She remembered the day she left him forever and how he silently cried as he held her cold, lifeless hand... The pain of seeing him hurt was too unbearable, she could not leave. But she had not understood at the time that she could never go back to the world in which he was living.
Her sobs turned into wails... The longing in her heart and the pain she felt grew stronger and stronger. After hours of crying, she finally managed to collect herself. She returned to the room to find that he had already dozed off at the desk. At last! This was her chance. She went over to the desk to find that his sketch was almost finished. Taking one glance at it, she started making muffled, sobbing noises again, which she tried in vain to control.
He'd drawn a picture of her... He'd never done that while she was alive and all those years they knew each other. She kept the sketchbook back on the desk and softly planted a kiss on his forehead. His eyelids fluttered...